I should know better. I really should.
Today I had a brainwave. I decided in my infinite wisdom I was going to paint the downstairs loo or W.C or cloakroom if you're posh.
I blame the BBC for this. If I wasn't for them showing some random programme this morning about tarting up your house I'd have happily sat on my butt with my remote control and a cup of tea and whiled the day away. But no daft olly here came over all Lawrence Llewelyn Bowen and made a wild dash to B&Q with contemporary thoughts and french chateau's on my mind!
Anyhow back I came, paint in hand, it's called "Illusion" which sounded a bit more classy than "Sexy Pink" and set about my task.
Course as soon as I started I remembered why I don't paint.
A) I suck at painting
B) It's beyond tedious
C) I am a messy tart and get more paint on myself than the walls.
Anyhow I've persevered and given it a first coat. It all went well and I thank the lord for swear words as those are all that have gotten me through the last hour...who knew I knew so many?!
"Illusion" has turned out to be less exciting than the name suggests...and is looking decidedly like white to me but I am assured by my 11 year old that it has a hint of grey/blue in it. Perhaps she's right. Maybe my eyes are just fecked from looking at the bloody stuff and squinting to reach the dodgy bits behind the toilet, sink and radiator!
Anyhow it's nearly time for round two. Jenny Versus The Loo. Although to be fair I doubt anyone would know it was me as I'm unrecogniseable due to the amounts of paint all over my body...my hair has got a large "Nancy From Nightmare On Elm Street" style grey streak...I fear it might not be paint but the result of the stress I am suffering after yet another stupid idea.
I've got 3 and a half hours to finish this, clean myself and my mess before Him What Says I Should Never Touch A Paintbrush returns from work! Wish me luck people!