Friday, March 31, 2006

Happy Blog Birthday To Me...

Doesn't time fly? It's one year ago today since I started this blog.

In that year...

I have become older, gained a few pounds and been brunette, red headed and blonde. I have been on 12 aeroplane's, been in accident & emergency on 3 occasions, owned 5 different cars, visted Iceland on 4 occasions, been in a helicopter and had 6 holidays.

I've been happy, hysterical, angry, sad, emotional and a little strange.

I've argued with people, laughed with people, cried with people, shouted at people and been in love with people.

I've made new friends and found old one's I'd lost touch with and better still I haven't lost any I did have...always a bonus!

I've been drunk more than a few times, I've been sick, I've seen the room spin but I haven't had a hangover.

I've bought more clothes than I've thrown out and I have less shoes than I had this time last year but I own more handbags and watches!

I've watched my Sis become single again and my Mum become part of a couple again. I've seen my baby start school and heard my daughter ask for her first bra (not bloody likely at 9!).

There have been no new births in my family and (sigh of relief) there has been no deaths either.

I've lost a wisdom tooth, 9 year old's lost a big tooth and 5 year old thinks he's found his first wobbly tooth.

I've been able to sit in a pub and smoke and now I've been made to stand outside a pub to smoke. I've taken drugs...but only on prescription. I've swapped Lemonade for Ginger Ale in my Vodka and I've realised that my Better Half snores like a pig.

I have been living with someone else's husband for longer than I lived with my own! Bizarrely though I am still a wife and have been married to my Husband for another year and will soon be "celebrating" my 10th wedding work it out!

I have gotten through another 365 days without my lovely Daddy and I am no longer angry with him.

I have toyed with idea of having another baby on at least 6 occasions but have still not thought of one good reason to go through it all again..I have managed to think of at least 5 why I shouldn't hence the reason I have not gotten pregnant in this last year.

All in all it's been a good 365 days.

Jenny xx

Thursday, March 30, 2006

Semi Final Jitters...

It's now only 2 days until Hearts take on Hibs in the cup semi at Hampden and I'm getting a wee bit anxious over it all.

I can only assume it's because we're playing Hibs and as they are our biggest rivals the thought of defeat to them is just making me feel uneasy. It may also be because whoever wins this tie should by rights go on to win the cup and the fact that it might be them is just...well it's just...not acceptable! We may well have given them their biggest chance of winning in over a century anyway given we are currently managerless and under the spell of Vlad the Impaler who seems hell bent on making us sweat with his timing for sacking managers!

Still we have history on our side. It's over 103 years since Hibs last won the cup...1902 to be precise and they've only ever done so twice in their history.

We have a slightly better record having won it 6 times. Which is highly significant in number terms as it goes. Why is the number 6 so significant? Well we've won it 6 times including 1895/96, 1905/06, 1955/56 and we've been defeated finalists 6 times including 1975/76, 1985/86 & 1995/96. We've had 6 managers since we last won it (ok so I'm counting the current caretaker manager but so what??) and there were 6000 tickets available for public sale for the match and... I'm clutching at straws now!! I am though taking this as a good omen!

So for the first time in my life I am not confident about us humping the green scum. There will be no great predictions from me about how we are going to breeze past them and run away with the cup. I am mentally preparing myself for a nerve wracking 90 minutes in Glasgow on Sunday whihc will only be eased if we are 3 up at half time or with minutes to go until the whistle. I am not gloating pending victory my Hibee friends or relations (yes I do have some!) and have remained unusually quiet.

Cup fever is beginning to grip Edinburgh though as over 57000 of us in either Green or Maroon prepare to head west this weekend. Come 2pm on Sunday one lot of us will be gutted on the road home and one lot will be singing all the way home (unless of course the result is a draw which will just make me want to puke!).

Let me assure you now that if I am in the lot which are gutted I will be instantly supporting whichever team is left to face Hibs in the final, so I will be either a Gretna or Dundee supporter come cup final day...and before you think I'm being petty...I always support the underdog which would be Gretna if they make it and I was born in Dundee so technically I can support them as my home team if I like! If of course I am among the lot which are singing heading home then you can expect me to be on here on Monday morning full of the joys of spring just don't expect to hear me say I knew we could do it!

Oh but did I mention there are also 6 letters in the word Hearts? Oh shit I've just realised that the last 3 times we've been defeated have all ended in a cancel that because that meant we got to the final and this is just a semi so it must be a good omen...and we won it 100 years ago so surely that's a good sign...

( Note to self - Fucking hell it's only a game! Deep breaths Jenny! )

Jenny xx

Like Mother, Like Son...

Tonight was Parent's Night at my kids school. The twice yearly occasion when my kids teachers get to tell me how the bairns are doing in school.

First up tonight was 5 year old's teacher. I couldn't help but notice that we were last on her list for the day...I had a feeling this might be an omen! We know from previous conversations with her that 5 year old can be a bit hyper at times and has a general likeness for singing at any given moment! Things began ok though as she informed us that he's settled into school really well and seems to really enjoy it (give him'll pass!). She also seemed really pleased with his progress in reading, writing and maths which was great.

She then went on to talk a bit about his attitude and approach to school and we get the same routine about his love of singing at silly times, how he likes to talk to himself, how he can be a bit hyper now and then. About halfway through she tells us a story about 5 year old which had occured earlier in the week.

5 year old had been a bit too chatty so she decided to move him seats to settle him back down. A few minutes after the move she heard 5 year old say "I've got a pain", concerned for him she asked him if he had said he was in pain. "Yes I have a pain in my head" 5 year old replied She asks 5 year old to tell her about the pain. "I am the pain" he states "I gave myself the pain because I talked too much and got moved". The teacher is a bit puzzled but 5 year old goes on "That's how I've got a pain now because I get sick of myself. I just sicken myself sometimes cause I talk too much" as he is saying this he is shaking his head. The teacher tells us she had to walk away from him to stop herself laughing because he sounded like such an old man as he said it. Geoff is just smiling at her as she finishes her story...I on the other hand am poorless. I have gotten the giggles at the image of 5 year old being sick of himself and I can't stop. I try hard to put an end to them but they just keep going and the sight of my son's teacher staring at me in disbelief doesn't help. "He's quite a character" she says trying to keep going "he really can be quite funny at times" but I have the sort of giggles that just cannot be controlled. The only cure is to walk away...I make my apologies and leave the room leaving Geoff and Miss Teacher sitting there. I vaguely hear Geoff telling her "Now you know where he gets it from".

I stand outside the classroom trying really hard to compose myself. I have tears running down my face. After a couple of minutes I manage to control myself enough to go back in. A few minutes (and complete silence from me) later we're all done. As we leave the classroom and say goodnight I can see clearly in my son's teacher's face that she is in no doubt where he gets his silly streak from.

I still had one more meeting to go but I was fine by the time I got to see 9 year old's teacher. Luckily there was no silliness story for her. She by all accounts is a fairly model pupil, tries hard, is imaginitive, polite and popular.

I wonder where she gets that from? Must be Geoff's influence! My boy on the other hand? Well he's just like his Mother!

Jenny xx

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

She's Alive...

I can stop worrying now...turns out Lena's not vanished of the face of the earth after all.

Jenny x

Monday, March 27, 2006

Happy Mother's Day...

Yesterday was Mother's Day and being the good girl I am I was at my Mum's in the morning carrying the necessary flowers, card and present.

Later on all of us (My and my lot and Wee Sis and her lot) went out with Mum for lunch, had a few drinks and headed back to Mum's where we ended up singing to all manner of things on the stereo!

Earlier in the day I had gotten my own Mother's Day pressies...a book, new pj's I'd been after and chocs but best of all was a small box with a tag on which my son had made at school for me. The tag on the tiny box read...

This is a very special gift that you can never see
The reason it's so special is it's just for you from me
Whenever you are lonely or ever feeling blue
You only have to hold this gift and know I think of you
You never can unwrap it please leave the ribbon tied
Just hold the box close to your heart
It's filled with my love inside

It was a stuggle to keep the tears in as my 5 year old advised me "Mum I made you a box of love at school". These are the sort of gifts I love! 5 year old's box of love is now in my handbag ready to go wherever I do! Aren't kids cute??

Happy Mother's Day to all the Mum's.

Jenny xx

Thursday, March 23, 2006

Passport Palaver...

Yesterday wee sis and I took a trip through to get 3 of our kids' passports renewed. We arrived in the morning and were told to come back at 1.30 as that was the first available slot for the day. So we then faced the prosepct of amusing ourselves in Glasgow for a good few hours before returning back there again later in the day. I should point out that to any Edinburger spending time trying to amuse yourself in Glasgow is fairly easy...just sit in the car and watch the (great unwashed) Weigies go by...hours of fun for all the family. However with shops open nearby we decided to head in their direction.

We had asked for the same day passport service at a cost of £84 each passport...daylight fucking robbery but there you go...and were assured this was fine and they'd get it sorted when we returned. After our few hours retail therapy, which invloved nothing more than the purchase of some chicken pakora, 2 mother's day cards and a cup of tea, we headed back to the Passport Office for our appointment.

We get shouted to the relevant desk and are met by a woman who must be in line for her retirement pension in the near future. She asks all the relevant questions, looks over the forms and says it all looks ok. So far, so good. However, next thing she's got hold of 5 year old's new passport photo. "Oh dear" she says in a condescending Irish/Weigie lilt. "These photos are you have this wee boy with you?". Given that all decent kids of schoolage should be in school at this time I point out to her that no I don't have my son with me...a fact she could have noticed if she'd opened her eyes which for some reason she felt the need to close at the end of every sentence. "Is there a problem with the photo?" I ask her.

It seems there is indeed a problem with his photo. She goes on to explain to me in her annoying lilt and with her severely slow blinking eyes that my son's face is very pale against the white background and not only that but you can't see his features. Can't see his features? I look again at the photo as she hands it back to me...2 eyes, 2 ears, hair, a chin, a mouth, a nose, some freckles, an earring and for good measure the scratches left from the previous days battles in the playground all perfectly clear. As for him being pale...he's scottish and a red head...being pale is normal! However despite my protests she is having none of it and not only that she is having none of my Sister's kids photo's either citing the fact that her son had shadows behind his ears and you couldn't see his features clearly and her daughter's photo appears a little on the dark side. What a crock of shit! To top it all when she asks why we need them renewed and I explain that we are travelling to the US who require that all visitors have a clear 6 months remaining on their passports she turns to me, nods and says "yes you do need that for America but saying that you need 6 months clear on your passport even if you're flying to London". Em Why??? Am I being an idiot? I always thought London was part of the you need a passport to fly to another city in your own country?? Anyway how come you don't need 6 months clear when you go to Spain???

I am more than a little narked by her attitude and listen in wonder as she tells me that you shouldn't get your passport photo from a booth in supermarkets, post offices or chemists. "Where the hell else are you supposed to find one then?" I ask. Apparently you should go to a photographers to have them done as this will ensure they are of the highest standards. In any event she tells us, it is now too late in the day to get the same day service and with a slow closure of her eyes and an assurance that she's "only trying to help" she sends us away asking us to return the next day with new photos.

So a total waste of 6 hours then!

Last night was spent returning to photo booths to try and get the prized perfect photo she demanded. I got 2 more sets of 5 year old done, wee sis got 2 more sets each of her 2 and so this morning we were back on the road to Glasgow. We got seen straight away this morning and handed over the photo's. This time we got a male worker and as he studied the new pictures of 5 year old and my niece and nephew I feared the worst. He seemed to accept my new addmission alright but wasn't keen on the ones my Sis submitted. He decided to let my niece's photo pass but wasn't going to accept my nephew's. The fact he was a man though worked in our favour...they are so much easier to manipulate! A few feminine charms, lots of chatter and joking and he crumbled! 5 minutes after saying he wouldn't take my nephew's picture, the forms had all got their clearance and were filed!

£250 was parted with and wee sis and I found ourselves with 4 hours to kill before we could go back and pick the passports up.

So once more we headed for the retail venues of Glasgow. The day wasn't completely wasted as we headed to Next and discovered they were having a massive shoe sale! I bought myself a gorgeous pair of 3.5 inch bronze glittery stillettos. Which I am sitting here wearing because I love them so much! Wee sis also grabbed a bargain, she spotted a pair she liked and after being unable to decide which colour she prefered she bought them in every colour they came in!

A few more purchases later and we realised our passport adventure had cost us around £450 over the 2 days!

Thankfully our kids are all now in possession of shiny new passports. We got our mitts on them and checked them to make sure they were alright...imagine the surprise when we looked at my nephews new passport only to discover that the photo they had put on it was the same one irish/weigie/shut eye woman had categorically refused to take the day before!! Fucking typical.

Jenny xx

Jenny xx

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

How On Earth...

Went to get 5 years old's new passport photo's yesterday. His is due to expire in August and as we're heading to the States soon he needs a clear 6 months on it which he wouldn't have. Since the UK powers that be decided a while back that all kids should have their own passports I now need to fork out another £70 for him to get a new one.

It's bloody bizarre the way the system works. The kids passports last for 5 years or until they are 16...last October 5 year old was carrying a passport with a photo of him in it at 14 months old! It could have been any child at all since he has changed a bit between 14 months and 5!! 9 year old got a new one last year which will take her till she's 14 so I then need to pay for a 5 year passport for her at £70 (although it will be higher by then no doubt) which she can only use for 2 years!

Someone I know had to get a passport for their daughter...she was 3 months old. How the hell are you supposed to get a 3 month old to sit for a passport photo? It was bad enough trying to get my wriggly 14 month son to sit still and even then he couldn't get high enough for his face to appear in the screen!

We delayed getting his photo's done for a few weeks because he had gone to bed and stuck chewing gum in his hair which then had to be cut out and had left a nice bald spot we held out until his hair had grown in again! We decided we needed to get it done yesterday so I can get through to the passport office with it and get ot done or we'll be cutting it fine...typically though 5 year old appeared home after school yesterday with a big scratch down his face and a red mark on his neck...Nice one.

Jenny xx


Why is it that nearly 5 weeks after Phil Daniels joined Eastenders I still feel the need to say things like "get some excerise" and "I sometimes feed the pigeons it gives me an enormous sense of wellbeing" every time he appears on screen?

For those of you with no idea what I'm on about...

Phil Daniels appeared in and spoke on Blur's Parklife single.

Jenny xx

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Previous Life...

Have you ever had that feeling where you meet someone for the first time and straight away feel really comfortable with them like you've known then forever? I have. It was like that when I first met Better Half. Within a few days of first meeting him I felt like I'd known him a lifetime. We were just comfortable with each other from day one. Maybe a bit too comfortable given 2 marriages ended up in ruins!!

A friend told me she thinks that when this happens it's because you knew each other in a previous life. Maybe she's right. Who knows? Mind you I reckon I was probably a buxom wench in a previous life, all heaving bosom, full skirts and lace up corsets, sitting in the pub with the sailors! I wonder what the hell that made Better Half if I knew him back then!

Jenny xx

Super Hero Powers...

Spiderman has the ability to climb anything. The Hulk can get all green and angry. Johnny Storm can burn everything up. The Incredibles are just incredible, a whole family filled with super hero powers! Wolverine can slice up stuff with his big long knife hands. The Fantastic Four have loads of powers.

Even a few non super hoeroes have super powers...Shrek can defeat scary dragons, The Wicked Witch of The West (my heroine) can fly on her broomstick and Mary Poppins can not only jump into chalk paintings but she can fly with an umbrella and clean a whole room with a click of her fingers now that's what I call a supernanny.

My personal favourite though is Superman. How good is he? Not only can he fly, he can also freeze things, lift really heavy stuff, take stuff away into space and is strong enough to spin the whole world round. That's well impressive. My favourite power of his though is his laser eyes.

I want a set of those. I want mine to be red lasers that instantly destroy whatever they are pointed at. How much fun would that be? Imagine just being able to look, shoot laser and destroy. People who annoy me...gone. Micra car's driving along slowly...gone. Mariah Carey and Paris Hilton...gone. Spiders of the world...gone.

I've been pointing my eyes and trying to fire lasers for many years and now and it's just not happening. I am confident one day though that red lasers will shoot out one of these days!

Before you go thinking I'm nuts. I'm not. Well not much anyway. I told Ross about my longing for laser eyes at work on Saturday and he looked at me as though I had escaped from the nearest funny farm but I know I am not alone. You might as well all admit it. You know you've all wished at one time that you had a super power!

To prove the point I have just asked Better Half (I try and shoot lasers at him a lot!) what super powers he'd have and he would like to be like Mr Freeze and be able to freeze everything. What a crap power to want but that's fine by me because my lasers would melt his ice so I win!!

Not that I'm competitive or anything!

Jenny xx

Monday, March 20, 2006

Good Weekends Ahead...

The next 2 weekends are going to be fun in this house. Well at least for me anyway!

Next Sunday is Mother's Day and as I am one of the millions of Mother's in this country I can look forward to breakfast in bed and the inevitable homemade cards that the kids will do in school...I like those one the best!

The Sunday after is my favourite day of the year...2nd of birthday! Yippee! I love birthdays even though my 21st is fading into the background! I'm not worried about getting older, I still feel about 21 and I am still able to get away with looking a few years younger than I am so it's all immaterial what age I will be!

Not only is Sunday 2nd April my birthday but it is the day of the Scottish Cup Semi Final between Hearts and Hibs. I will be spending part of my birthday in Hampden Park in Glasgow along with thousands of others. Obviously if Hearts win then my birthday will be the bestest day ever...but if we lose...well it may turn out a bit shitty but either way I get to drink myself into an alcohol induced coma so it's not all bad!

Jenny xx

A Very High Opinion...

Better Half got that brown envelope through the post a few eeks ago. The one that says the name of a court on it and is very official. The one that says you pay your taxes and have registered to vote and so you have won the lucky "jury duty" lottery.

He's away to today for the first selection thingy that you need to do.

We were out for dinner last night and were heading home when 5 year old asked his Dad what he was doing the next day.

"Well tomorrow I'm going to court" said Geoff and before he got any further 9 year old piped up "Why what have you done now? whatever it was your probably guilty" before being followed by 5 year old's "Well that's it're going to prison".

How nice that they have such a high opinion of their Father!!

I should point out that apart from one appearance for speeding (doing 61 in a 40 zone) Geoff has never been in court apart from Jury duty!!

Jenny xx

Sunday, March 19, 2006

Stamp Of Approval...

My car now has the official Ross Douglas stamp of approval.

Who says women don't know what to look for when buying a car?? We're not all looking for lights on the vanity mirror or room in the boots for shoe purchases (although both are a bonus obviously!).

There are a fair few of us girlies who are avid Top Gear watchers (not only due to Richard Hammond...although to be fair having him on there does help!) and who know our Ford Gt's from our Ferrari F430's and know that new Jaguar XK is unquestionably better than a 6 series and was designed by the same man who brought us the Aston Martin DB9.

Many women have now realised that a car can be just as much a great accessory as this season's must have Vuitton handbag...if a tad more expensive! Having a good car and a bit of knowledge about them is also a great pulling technique...not only does a nice car turn heads but being able to talk "technology" about cars is almost as impressive to a man as knowing the offside rule (I'm dead clever because I know the offside rule!).

Of course for every girl who knows a bit about cars there are still loads more who haven't a clue. They are either happy to let the men in their lives choose their cars for them or go for the smallest car they can find so they can park it easier...and don't even get me started on the women who think so little of their cars that they feel the need to cover the parcel shelf in furry animals and the steering wheel in a pink fluffy thing!

There are still too many women content in the safety zone of their Micra's and their 206's, too afraid of anything over a 1.4 engine.

I'm not one of them. There are no guarantee's in life but I can give you one for will never find me in a garage buying a Micra. Ever. If you do please take me directly to the nearest asylum because it will be obvious that I have lost my mind.

Jenny xx

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

They're Not Daft...

I called my bank last week to check up on a few things related to my account. I got the answers I was after and was ready to hang up wen the lady at the branch asked me when I had last had a review done on my accounts.

Well that answer was simple. Never. I could see this question was leading somewhere and it did. For the next few minutes I was hit with a serious of questions and statements from her...

Did I know that I had quite a bit of money in my various accounts?
Did I know I could be getting better intrest rates?
Why did I not have a mortgage with them?
Had I thought of investing my money?
Why did I not have a credit card with them?
Had I condsidered buying shares perhaps I'd like to buy shares in the bank?
Had I thought about having the accounts reviewed because the bank have lots of special offers for someone like me?

Someone like me? Would that be the same me that once seperated from my husband and wanted to buy his share of the house we lived in but wasn't considered good enough despite having a good job and a good income? Would that be the same me that as soon as I did seperate from my husband got her measly £100 overdraft limit removed? Would that be the same me as the one they took the cheque book from as soon as she became a single woman with a child? I assume it is the same me that got her cheque book and overdraft back as soon as she put a man's name back on her account?

I politely informed her that I was well aware of the balances in my account. That I knew I might get a better intrest rate with a different account, that I didn't have a mortgage with them because I had gone elsewhere and had since sold the house for a nice profit thank you very much, that I have little or no intention of investing my money in anything at this moment, that I had credit cards with other suppliers, that I'd be a damn sight more likely to give my money to charity than take shares in the bank and that she needn't worry too much about reviewing the accounts because I planned to spend every penny in them on shoes, cars and holidays and that if she had really looked at my accounts properly she would have seen that this course of action was already well under way.

Before any of you get any mad ideas that I'm rich beyond my wildest dreams...I'm not. Far from it. I do have a bit tucked aside but it came from 2 sources that I'd much rather have alive and well and standing beside me now if you get my meaning. The simple fact is that as soon as anyone has any credit in their accounts the bank's go wild to throw things at them...all of which are designed to make more money for the bank! Anyway I'm quite sure that the sources I got my money from would much rather see me use it to put a smile on all our faces rather than line the pockets of the I'm going to stick to the shoes, cars and holiday plan!!

Jenny xx

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

How To Make Grown Up’s Cry…

Last night there was a documentary on BBC 1 looking back at Dunblane Tragedy. It was 10 years ago to the day that Thomas Hamilton walked into Dunblane Primary school and shot randomly at a class in the school’s gym hall.

It’s strange how sometimes you can’t recall where you were last Tuesday but you can always recall where you were when you heard about something like this. How many times have you heard someone say “I can still remember where I was when Kennedy was shot?” or “I was at work when I heard Elvis had died?”. I wasn’t born when Kennedy was shot but I can recall exactly where I was when I first heard about 9/11 and I know exactly where I was when I heard that something had happened in Dunblane Primary.

I was off work that day with shocking morning sickness as I was 2 months pregnant with my daughter. I was sat in front of the tv feeling sorry for myself watching Richard & Judy when reports first came through. An hour after the first news flash (which had claimed 2 people had been shot in the school) the news came through that in fact as many as 6 children had been shot dead. That was bad enough but a few hours later it was revealed that the number was 16 and the teacher had also been killed, 12 were injured and only 1 child out of the whole class had escaped without injury. It was also confirmed that these wee one’s were Primary One’s…aged just 5.

The next few days were filled with news about the events in Dunblane and tv screens and newspapers were filled with the images of the little ones who lost their lives. I wasn’t yet a parent back then as I was awaiting my first stork visit but you didn’t have to be a parent to feel utter sadness and grief for those wee babies and their poor families.

Time passes though and the news changes and before you know it 10 years have passed. We all know the cliché that time is a great healer and it is but last night proved that while time can ease the pain it doesn’t erode it altogether. Dunblane will always be associated with the terrible events that took place there.

As I watched last night I felt unbelievable sadness again for what happened in that small town. I had tears running down my face as I watched the people who had been involved on the day recount what happened. The tears continued as I watched the parents describe the wait they had before finding out that they were one of the unlucky one’s who had lost a child. The tears stayed as I watched the parents wonder what their child would have been like now as a 15 year old. The tears kept coming as I watched the original footage of the police officer telling a packed press conference of those who had died repeating “aged 5 “ at the end of each of their names. You would have needed a heart of stone not to have at least felt a lump in your throat.

When the programme drew to end I got up and walked away to have a cigarette feeling a bit like I had lost something myself. Maybe because of my change in circumstances in the last ten years I felt the sorrow a bit more last night. I now live in a small community where everyone knows each other like Dunblane. I am now also a mother of 2 and one of my 2 just happens to be a 5 year old in Primary One with all his life ahead of him…just like those wee one’s were.

Whatever the reason I went to bed last night with a sadness about me, but not before I had looked in on my kids. 9 year old was fast asleep but 5 year old was awake…I looked at him, told him I loved him and gave him a hug all the while counting my blessings.

There was a bright spot covered in the programme last night though and that was the fact that following Dublane changes were made to our laws. The new Labour government which came to power a year or so after Dunblane immediately banned the use of handguns in the U.K following failure by the previous administration to bow to public pressure and do so. They also took action to ensure better security in our schools. Try walking into a school today off the streets…it’s not easy…and that’s how it should be.

It is just a pity that 17 innocents lost their lives before these measures were considered necessary.

Jenny xx

Sunday, March 12, 2006

What A Fucking Liberty...

as the Grandma in the Catherine Tate show would say.

Today we woke up to snow. Proper, deep, drifty snow. Well proper, deep, drify snow Scottish style. Which means we've got about 5 inches on the pavements and drifts of about 5 feet in places! Still it has been enough to ground the country to a major halt...again!

Better Half had was due to get his eyes tested this morning and so we figured we'd venture out to meet the appointment assuming the main roads would be alright. We got the car to the end of the cul-de-sac and then went into wheel spin, so we decided to head out of the village by another route. We made it to the main road which connects Edinburgh and Livingston but when we got down there it was chaos, cars were stationary, lorries were stuck and other cars were wheel spinning for fun. The snow was too deep to drive on and there had been no clearing done on it so basically no-one was going anywhere. . However as luck would have it a snow plough appreared as if by magic and started clearing the road. So the cars started following in it's path...eventually we made it to Livingston and a journey which normally takes about 5 minutes had taken 40.

We negotiated the car park which was a bit dodgy and headed into the centre and to the opticians...only to find a handwritten note stuck on the window of the shop reading "Due to bad weather this store will not be opening today, as staff have been unable to make it in. sorry for any inconvenience".

Un-fucking-believable. So I whipped a pen out of my handbag and promptly wrote underneath "staff might not have made it but your bloody cutomers did!!" much to the amusement of the onlookers before heading back to the car to begin the journey home.

We got back along the main road in record time...yeah right...and turned into the road leading to the village only to find car's stuck in deep snow and a helpful driver came to tell us "the car's are aw stuck, they're just gettin' oot and leavin' them there cause ye cannae get past". Why the drivers thought it was a good idea to try and drive into 4 & 5 feet snow drifts is beyond me anyway. So we had to about turn, rejoin the main road and find another route into the village. Finally we made it back to the street and back home just as the snow started falling heavily again.

Honestly there are 3 routes into the village and whenever we get snow they never bloody clear any of them. In 2001 when we last had really deep snow we were stuck in the village for 3 days, seriously, no clear routes in or out and the whole street missed work and played on sledges was great!... but that year the snow was several feet deep on the pavements and the drifts were huge, eventually the council sent tractors and jcb's into the street to pile the snow up so we could re-join the rest of the world! Still we have one semi clear route (for now!) so we know we can get to civilisation if we need to this time...but it seems civilisation can't get to us though because the one shop in the village has had no deliveries today. One wee bit of snow and there's no bloody milk for anyone. You'd think they could afford more snowploughs with all the council tax we pay!

What a fucking liberty!

Jenny xx

p.s 9 year old is deeply concerned in case school is closed tomorrow. She is due to go on a field trip to the Scottish Parliament and is worried in case the weather means she'll miss out on getting to go. Quite frankly she should be more worried in case she does have to go and visit it...she might get hit by one of the bits if the £460 million pound building which are falling off...what a fucking waste of money that building was...imagine the number of snowploughs they could have bought for £460 million!

Saturday, March 04, 2006

What's A Girl To Do...

This was the view outside my door on Friday at Noon. The sky was leaden, the snow which we thought we were going to avoid had decided to visit after all, it was bitter outside and worst of all my shiny paintwork was covered in a blanket of white!

I've got to be honest though and say that I quite like it when we get snow. It doesn't happen as often as it used to or maybe I'm getting old and nostalgic for my childhood...kind of like the way your parents always say "when I was young the summers were always long and hot". As soon as the snow comes I am wrapping the kids up and dragging out the sledges and we're all off up the hill for a few hours of silliness. This week though with being under the weather I didn't get out with the kids. Instead I found the cold weather a bit depressing...maybe it was because I was only watching from the the kid who's grounded!...or maybe it was just because I felt a bit shitty anyway...who knows?

I knew though that I had to take drastic action to make me feel better. I needed something to perk me up, something to take my mind of being ill and the cold weather. So what does a girl do in these circumstances? Well normally it would be retail therapy but I tried that on Wednesday and it did help a little but not enough...even though I bought new shoes! Maybe giving my car a good hurl would have helped but the weather put paid to that form of therapy. There was only one thing for it...

So I clicked on my mouse and booked a trip to Florida!

What better way to get over being ill and the cold weather than 2 weeks in the Florida sunshine!

So in just over 5 weeks I'm off to see Mickey Mouse...despite swearing blind I wasn't heading back over the Atlantic until December (my annual Minneapolis trip is now booked...did that on Thursday!). Instead of rolling Easter Eggs in Edinburgh I'll be rolling along on rollercoasters!

Jenny xx

My New Toy...

I picked up my new toy on Wednesday. First time I have ever had a brand new car on new registration day. I didn't get to enjoy the feeling of driving about with my sparkly new 06 plate though and having people look at me because I have a personal number plate. However the car did cause a few heads to turn as we drove it home from the garage probably because of the lovely noise the engine gives off!

Sadly due to feeling like shit for the last week I haven't felt like taking it for a decent spin yet and for the most part it's been sat outside doing nothing. I fully intend to rectify this as soon as I feel a bit better!

I have though in one of the few times I been in it discovered that it will get up to 90mph in less than 8 seconds which is all good!

Jenny xx


I am now ill enough to be able to cough up the phlegm which has been threatening to appear all week. Unfortunatley I'm not one of those who can cough it up and spit it out like you should to be rid of it. It just makes me gag. I am a swallower not a least when it comes to phlegm! I am now sporting a cough that I didn't expect to have until well into my 50's when the ciggies finally make their mark on my body.

I have battled with this viral thingy for a week now and decided not to give in and stayed out of bed and on the move...I now have to admit defeat because the bug is winning the battle and instead of getting better I feel it looks like it's antibiotics and rest for a few days then!

Jenny xx