Screenplay Idea...

So I've had this idea for a screenplay. Here's the plot outline...

The story is set around a small commune which has been locked in a time warp by it's rulers. The back story tells us how the rulers, known as The Clique, were voted into their leadership by making the people think they were wise and knowledgable with the power to make the commune a good place to be and pledging promises of better times ahead. We soon see that these were false promises though as The Clique, once they have secured their places, become increasingly more dictorial and begin making decisions to suit their own agenda. That agenda is to keep the people under their power, to opress them and to govern them with rules that are decades out of date and that hold little relevance to todays society...rules which keep the commune locked in a time warp and away from the real world and it's influence.

We see examples of how The Clique do this. Denying the people the right to dress as they wish, actively encouraging the wearing of cardigans and sensible shoes. Dictating the prices of goods throughout the commune. Forbidding the people to walk on grassed areas within the commune. Putting their corrupt insiders into positions of power where they can spy on the people. Denying rights to freedom of speech.

The people of the commune are shell shocked at having to live under these regulatory guidelines but initially still believe The Clique who tell them that these harsh rules are for the long term benefit of the commune. However, we see The Clique make one or two decisions which begin to cause restlessness and concern amongst the people. They make decisions of what social activities the commune people can participate in and begin summoning people in front of them in their grand hall to punish them for small misdemeanours.

Meanwhile 2 freedom fighters (Joss and Ren) are becoming increasingly concerned about the decisions and actions of The Clique. They are long term friends who have been at the commune for many years. We flash back to see how they met and the bond that is between them. Beautiful scenes show us the two of them as teenagers before losing touch with each other as life taken them on separate paths. Later we see them meeting up again a decade or so later when they both come to the commune, older, wiser but still bound together by their sense of humour, love of the written word and shared history.

Slowly but surely The Clique begin to stamp down on the people. Everyone is under scrutiny as they seek to become ever more dominant and Joss soon finds himself called to the grand hall and being questioned about a trip he made outwith the commune. The Clique are unhappy about it and decide to punish him. By now there is a air of discontent with in the commune. Some people are beginning to realise that The Clique are out to crush them. Small groups form and discuss how they feel. Joss and Ren hear the whispers and when Ren is subjected to bullying by one of The Cliques corrupt insiders after rejecting sexual advances from them she decides to speak out. Flashbacks show us the corrupt insider making his advances and Ren shunning them. We then see how the corrupt insider slowly turns against Ren and plots revenge against her. Meanwhile The Clique have become aware of Ren's outspokeness and she is summoned to the grand hall under the pretence that they want to help her. Within minutes Ren realises it has all been a set up and that corrupt insider has lied to The Clique. They decide to punish Ren and banish her from the commune, never to be seen again.

The Clique do not disclose what has happened with Ren. They remain silent but let rumour slip that Ren was corrupt and out to tarnish and destroy the commune. Ren, though had made plans with Joss to ensure he could listen in on what the Clique said to her at her summons. We watch as he sits in a quiet place, risking being caught, to hear what is said in the Grand Hall. Joss makes sure that the people of the commune know the truth. That Ren was set up and banished. He knows that speaking out may well cause him to be next and is unsurprised to find himself summoned just a short while later. Concurrently we see The Clique being told by a corrupt insider of what Joss has been saying. We see them set up monitoring of his actions, looking out for misdemeanours and evidence of his contravening the non-right to freedom of speech.

Joss is also punished heavily. He too is stripped of everything he had in the commune and is expelled into the great beyond. The Clique are keen to show the people of the commune that dissent and non-conformity to their rules will not be accepted.

The people of the commune are shocked. Many weaken and decide it is best to comply with The Cliques demands and rules but factions start to form...The Clique underestimated the effect that banishing Joss and Ren might have. A secret underground movement begins to grow. Fed up with living in a dictatorship, under an oppressive regime that acively encourages them to become old before their time and wear cardigans and sensible shoes. Plans are quietly being made to overthrow the regime and to hold an uprising against The Clique.

Meanwhile Ren and Joss are meeting up in the outside world. Ren has made friends with a freedom fighter called Sol who is well qualified in quashing organisations like The Clique. She introduces him to Joss and together they work to find a solution and make people aware of the levels of corruption and the tyrannical ways of The Clique. We see lots of late night shots with beer and whisky as they 3 look over books and do research for their quest. Joss and Ren get a message to the underground group in the commune to tell them of their plans. Together with Ren's friend Sol they decide to take action against The Clique at a higher level by going to the outside worlds highest juristiction The People's Tribune to get them to agree to put sanctions on The Clique. The plan is complicated but Joss, Ren and Sol hope that if The People's Tribune agree to enforce sanctions it will show more people in the commune the errors of The Clique and weaken their hold.

Joss and Ren put their case to The People's Tribune... We see the tense meetings as Joss and Ren put their cases to The People's Tribune and scenes are played showing the wait for the outcome on which the whole plan rests...they are overjoyed when The People's Tribune finds in their favour and agrees to put sanctions in place. This gives the green light to the underground group and reports of the sanctions begin to leak to the people of the commune. More and more people go to the underground group to tell them of punishments they have received and their discontent at The Clique and it's oppressive regime. Soon the underground group has a good number of supporters. The Clique sense something is afoot and call a mass summons in the grand hall. All the people of the commune attend. The Clique know they are in a weakened position and suspect there may be a restlessness among the people and intend to use the meeting to crush any uprising. However, the underground group, also realising the weakened position of The Clique make their move and one by one begin throwing questions at The Clique about their running of the commune. We see scenes of chaos as the people become unruly, shouting and demanding answers. Corrupt insiders try in vain to restore order. Suddenly there is a loud bang, Nala the leader of the underground group has banged a big stick down on the floor. The sound gets everyone's attention. Nala steps forward. The room goes quiet. Nala looks in the direction of the leader of The Clique, Cardiman, and asks for the truth of what happened with Joss and Ren...we see the following scene played out...

Nala: "What happened with Joss and Ren?"
Cardiman: “You want answers?”
Nala: “I think I'm entitled”
Cardiman: “You want answers?”
Nala: “I WANT THE TRUTH"
Cardiman: “You can't handle the truth”

[The room is quiet enough to hear a pin drop, instead we hear the sharp intake of breath as an old guy takes a puff of his inhaler...]

Nala: "Do you think your decision was right?"
Cardiman: "It doesn't matter..."
Nala: "DO YOU THINK YOU WERE RIGHT!"
Cardiman: "Take caution in your tone, I'm a fair guy, but this fucking heat is making me absolutely crazy" (Cardiman is beginning to sweat and plays with the knot if his tie)
Nala: "Answer the question"
Cardiman: “I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket... that I provide... and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way”
Nala: "Do you have an answer to the question?"

[Cardiman straightens his cardigan, takes of his glasses and slowly and smugly turns to address the people...]

Cardiman: “It's become obvious that Nala’s intention this afternoon is to smear a high ranking member of The Clique in the desperate hope that the mere appearance of impropriety will win him points with the people and the outside world. Now, it is my recommendation, that Nala be reprimanded for his conduct...”

[Nala cuts in....]

Nala: "Did you order the expulsions of Joss and Ren?"
Cardiman: "I have nothing further to say" [he again removes his glasses and rubs his forehead]
Nala: "ANSWER THE QUESTION YOU FUCKING SHIT"
Cardiman: "It was a code red expulsion, they deserved nothing more"
Nala: "Did you order the code red?"
Cardiman: "I did the job I...."
Nala: "DID YOU ORDER THE CODE RED?"
Cardiman: "YOUR GODDAMN RIGHT I DID!!" [Cardiman's face goes all wrinkly and evil]

[There is an audible series of gasps from the people...before silence descends again...]

Nala: "Thank you, at last we seem to be getting somewhere"

[A faint snore is heard in the room from the direction of an old dear who has nodded off...]

Cardiman: "I don't need to take this crap. You're gonna be crushed now because you've done something and I...I...I don't like it!" [He again rubs his forehead and shuffles papers about]
Nala: "Enough, I'm getting tired of you now" [Nala does a big over-exaggerated yawn and rolls his eyes]
Cardiman: "I'm gonna rip the eyes out of your head and piss in your dead skull! You fucked with the wrong man”
Nala: "Boorrrrrrinnnngggg" [Nala yawns again, this time with a big show over covering his mouth]
Cardiman: "Son, I am somebody. I have Royal connections. I could take you down. There's nothing about Cardigans I don't know. You will never be man enough to fill my sensible shoes"
Nala: "Whatever Loser" [Nala makes the sign of an L on his forehead]
Cardiman: "Why you little fool... [Cardiman's voice becomes unrecognisable and takes on a Russian accent]...I vill deestroy you!"
Nala: "I'm sorry sir but I don't think so. Your time is up. There will be no more cardigans worn or sensible shoes. The Clique and you are weakened. We are taking back our commune. I'm going to ask you to get up now and leave. I would add that you doing so would mean you retain a shred of dignity but you've lost that with your really poor Ivan Drago impression a moment ago. Save yourself anymore embarrassment and walk away now...while you still have the use of boths legs".

A ripple of applause breaks out around the room and becomes a deafening sound as the people of the commune rejoice. The old dear who had nodded off is awoken with a start "Is it over, Have we won the war then?" she asks.

We see Cardiman look stunned and startled as ordinary people of the commune go towards him and his cronies in The Clique to escort them to the boundary. Quietly he gets up, runs his hands down his biege cardigan and with his fellow Clique members behind him he walks to the door of the grand hall.

The room quietens down to watch them leave...

Cardiman: "You haven't seen the last of me. I won't let this rest here...[his voice becomes unrecognisable and he takes on an Austrian accent]... I'll be back"
Nala: "Get tae fuck ya muppet"

The Clique members leave and the people of the commune begin to celebrate with the help of a man with an accordian and some line dancing. Joss and Ren appear at the doorway accompanied by Sol...no longer are they banished...they hug Nala and smile at each other. Camera fades away leaving a scene of jubilation.

The End.

Jenny xx

P.S - This is a work of fiction. It is not based on actual events. Any likeness to any persons either living or dead is purely co-incidental. Names are made up. Scenes are made up. Some words have been ripped from a movie and blended in with my own.

If you have been offended by this posting and decide to whine about it then you are either a cardigan wearing control freak, an asthmatic, an old dear who nods off or a member of a Clique who wishes to oppress people and frankly I wouldn't be admitting to be any of them (except maybe the asthmatic and old dear bits) because how does one explain being a cardigan wearing control freak or a member of an oppressive Clique without looking like a total choob?? However should you wish to whine anyway feel free to leave a comment so all my other readers can have a laugh at you.