Who Needs A Soap Opera....

So I'm chatting away to Ross last night about my life and he decides he's going to call me "River City" from now on. Apparently I have a life like a soap opera!

Now personally I consider myself and my life to be pretty much the same as everyone else's I mean I haven't experienced anymore drama than the average person. However, in view of Rosco's comment I have decided it's only fair to lay out my experiences before you all and you can judge for yourself.

Where to begin though? Well my childhood was very normal, no divorces, murders, affairs etc. I wasn't a drug addicted teenager and I have never had a drink problem. There was no incest, abuse of any form nor did I ever sleep with one of my sisters boyfriends!! There is a possibility we have slept with the same man though but not at the same time!

My adult life has been a little different I suppose...

I got married and had a baby within 5 months, I indulged in a few flings while married but no sex and nothing serious! I did meet a man while married who lit up my world and 5 weeks after meeting him I realised what love was and left my Husband to be with him. He was also married and he too left his Wife to be with me. We moved into together within 7 weeks of first meeting and 4 weeks later I was pregnant...

We found out at one point that my Maternal Grandmother was adopted and so a bit portion of our "family" turned out not to be after all...

Turned out my Great Grandmother gave my Gran away to one of her friends, no legal adoption, just a very intresting gift!

I have a Great Aunt who has two sons, both alive and both called James...

It was long thought that my Dad and his cousin (one of the above named James'!) may well have been brothers as they were so alike...my Grandfather dispelled this to us about a a year ago saying he did sleep with his wife's sister but was not my Uncle's Dad!

My other Great Aunt had a son who was raised for 20 years to think he was her Brother...

My Dad had 4 step brothers and sister's all of whom spent their childhood in care before being "rescued" by my Grandfather and brought to live with him and his new wife.

My Step Gran spent a period in an institution with suicidal tendancies and depression follwoing her divorce from her first Husband.

My Uncle Andrew had a son called Andrew from his first marriage, then married a woman whose ex husband was called Andrew and who also had a son called Andrew from her first marriage, My Uncle Andrew's son then had a son and called him Andrew...

My Auntie had post-natal depression so bad she was institutionalised...

My Uncle died in an accident falling 10 feet off a ladder...

My Dad was lifted by the police and fined for breach of the peace after refusing to give his name to a police officer who asked for it...he instead spent 10 hours in a cell repeating his army rank and number...

My Dad once tried to chat up my Auntie on a train while in the army totally unaware that she was married to a member of his family...

My ex Husband still to this day does not who his Dad was...I suspect his Mother doesn't know either!...she has refused to tell him until he old enough to know...my ex husband is 43!

I was born with a paralysed arm on the right side, allegedly I should be left handed because of this, I'm not I'm right handed...however I can move my right arm into positions other's don't seem to be able to and I have no reflexes on my right hand side at all...

My son was born blue, or flat as medics call it...he had stopped breathing inside the womb during labour, he spent 10 days in special care and has thankfully had no side effects at all...

My sister's children both have health complaints which are potentially life threatening, one is allergic to nuts the other has epilepsy...

My Dad dropped down dead out of the blue...My Grandparents died with 3 weeks of each other...All 3 of them died within 24 days...

My Mother in Law had a heart attack seconds before we walked in to hospital to see her, she was resusitated but after being on life support for 3 days she passed away...

I have a step daughter who is 17 next month...she lives in an area of Edinburgh with a bad reputation so potentially I could be a step gran soon...

I live in a street where everything is a drama and everyone knows everyone else's business...

So that about sums it up, well at least what I can remember...

"River City" or perfectly normal? As Davina would say "You Decide"!!!

Jenny xx